The Rose Garden

Our group that journeyed to El Salvador was made up of 13 youth and 8 adults. We were called ¡Y.E.S! El Salvador which stood for Youth from Edgewood-Oxford Sojourning to El Salvador. Together we shared in 15 two hour orientation sessions. Each youth was responsible for the closing of one orientation session. We heard poems like “The Road Not Taken” but Robert Frost, readings, songs, and original pieces written by the youth. The day that Chris did his closing, the crowd was left silent.

Chris had been reading about El Salvador, trying to find the inspiration to prepare something. What he found was a story about 6 Jesuit Priests who were assassinated during the Civil war. Chris went on to explain that the story did not end there, but that the military also found a woman who was a domestic worker and her daughter; they shot and killed them as well. Chris said he could not get the story out of his mind so after a sleepless night, he wrote a poem for his closing from the perspective of the little girl. It was called “The Circus”. It was tragically sad and it gave us a taste of the deep seeded sadness we would feel walking in solidarity with the people of El Salvador. However, we had no idea that we would visit the place where this horrific event took place.

The University of Central America is called the UCA. It is a prestigious and expensive university that few in El Salvador can afford to attend. Two out of every hundred women and three out of every hundred men continued their education by attending university (statistics from 1999). During the civil war many of the priests, nuns and other religious people were suspected of supporting the ideals held by the guerrilla movement. The Jesuit priests who lived and taught at the UCA were accused of supporting and hiding guerrillas and when the government's military troops relocated to the city they had a “mission” to enter the UCA and leave behind no survivors.

On Nov 16^th lined them up and shot them in the back of their heads and left their bodies on the grass where, 1989, they entered at night and found the 6 priests they were looking for. They they had been assassinated. The troops did not stop there either, they found Elba, the woman hired to as a domestic, hiding in a small room with her fifteen year old daughter, Celina. Once the fighting was coming to the city, Elba and her daughter and husband asked to stay behind the walls of the UCA because they were scared for their safety and wanted to be closer to work. In that little room, Elba and Celina were also shot and killed.

We saw photographs of the people after their lives had been stolen from them. The culture of Latin America, and particularly of a country that was ravaged by such horrific war crimes, is different that what we are accustom to here in Canada. While visiting the UCA several photo albums were brought for us to look at. There were photos like nothing I have ever seen (unless you include movies). The photo that was burned into my memory was of Celina and her mother in a pool of blood in their room. Elba was obviously trying to protect her daughter and Celina's hands were together, as though in prayer. Even though these unthinkable actions were taken.... the faith Salvadorans have is extremely evident. When it seems like everything has been stripped of them, they still have their faith.

At the UCA we visited a rose garden that has been planted in memory of the 6 men and two women who died. There are 6 red rose bushes planted in memory of the six priests: Ignacio Martín-Baró, Amando López , Ignacio Ellacuría, Segundo Montes, Juan Ramón Moreno, and Joaquín López y López. And two white rose bushes planted in memory of Elba and Celina Ramos.

During our time in El Salvador, our group would still get together to talk about what we have seen. After the first couple days, we had already seen a lot of things. Many of our group felt profoundly affected by what we had seen and I think Nathan said it best when he said, “The world may not be different because I have some to El Salvador. But I feel very different because of what I now know and so MY world will never be the same again”.

The Massacre at El Mozote

There are times in our lives when you become so focused and consumed by something that everything else temporarily fades away. Listening to Fidelia's story was like that for me. I felt like I was a part of the story; it touched me THAT deeply.

I could see the faces, I could hear the cries, I could taste the tears and I could feel the pain. I knew that the pain I felt was negligible compared to what Fidelia and her mother, Rufina, felt. But I promised Fidelia to tell this story. The story her mother told for 25 years to anyone who would listen. The story that they felt God called them to tell. The story about the massacre at El Mozote in Morazan, El Salvador that began on December 11^th, 1981.

El Mozote is a little town lost in the hills. We drove up hill for many miles on twisty dirt roads surrounded by lush green trees and plants. It really did seem like we were in the middle of nowhere when a little town appeared. There is not much left to El Mozote. There is a church, a memorial, a small store selling drinks and a community pila (sink) where two woman and two little boys were washing clothes. Like all of the places we had visited, cows, pigs and chickens walked freely about.

Fidelia told us that she was 16 years old in 1981. She was 4 months pregnant and had left the community of El Mozote to be with her husband, who was also 16. They knew of the fighting but it had not come into the area's where they were. On December 11th, she came to El Mozote to visit her mother, Rufina. Rufina had re-married and had four children who were 9, 5, 2 and 8 months

old. Fidelis was accompanied by 5 other children and she was the oldest. They left El Mozote at 4PM. By 6PM the soldiers had entered and taken the entire community of El Mozote captive.

Fidelia and the 5 younger children encountered the soldiers while leaving the town and she knew that the military, unlike the guerrilla fighters, needed to be feared. They fled into the hills and hid behind some huge rocks before the soldiers were aware of their presence. They hid here for four days without food or water. From their vantage point they could see down into the villages below. Fidelia said they could see the horrific things that were happening. They watched innocent people get assassinated. Men and women killed by the military. They saw the soldiers take babies from their mother's arms and throw them into the air and catch them on their bayonet. It was like a nightmare.

Eventually the soldiers left and so Fidelia and the children, driven by hunger and fear for the baby growing inside of her, left their hiding place. They went looking for food and a safe place to stay. They were spotted by military soldiers and they began to run for their lives. One of the younger girls fell and broke her arm but Fidelia and the others had to keep running. The girl was killed. Eventually the group ran into some soldiers an

d thought this would be the end and surely they would be killed but they realized that they were guerrilla soldiers (one of whom was Fidelia's cousin) and they were taken to a safe place. It was several days after that, when Fidelia was reunited with her mother, Rufina, that she learned that Rufina was the sole surviver of the massacre at el Mozote and everyone was dead. It was here that Fidelia learned her mother's story.

Rufina felt that God had given her the mission to tell this story and she did until her death in March'07. Fidelia has continued with this mission of speaking the truth and giving all the innocent people a voice.

The soldiers all entered and immediately took over the entire town. They separated all of the men into the church and the women and children in a house across from the church. In the town lived about 1000 people, the majority were children. At the time, Rufina did not even know what a gun was but it was something she knew she needed to fear. Houses were shot up, and today the remnants of these homes are still standing as a memorial to the past. Rufina lived next to this shell of a house with her husband, Domingo, and four young children: Jose - 9, Dolores - 5, Maria Lilian - 2 and Maria Isabel - 8 months.

For two days Rufina and her children, along with hundreds of woman and children were crammed into a house unsure of their fate. There was a small window that looked out towards the church. Rufina could see the men lined up and eventually killed. Next the soldiers would come into the house with the woman and children. If a child was crying a lot, the

y were killed. Then women were taken out and infants were ripped from their arms and thrown on the floor. All the children were crying for their mothers. The young girls were taken and raped. Rufina fought so hard to stay with her children so she was the last woman in the line. When the soldiers began to kill the women things got very confusing because the women were screaming and so were the children. Rufina was not killed. She stayed still and pretended to be dead.

Rufina just kept praying to God and to the Virgin of Guadalupe for strength. She pulled down some branches and hid in them. The soldiers did not see her. She continued to pray for strength and protection although she could hardly stand it. While she was hiding she heard the soldiers speaking about the children. She heard one soldier say that the children were innocent and that he did not want to kill them. After some further discussion that soldier was shot dead because the order had been clear to leave NO SURVIVORS.

Rufina could hear the children being murdered but she kept on praying. The bodies were put into houses and they houses were set on fire. After the fires were set Rufina could hear a cry from inside the burning house of a small child. One soldier commented that all the children had not been killed well...

Rufina prayed and prayed but did not know how she could escape. Then some cattle and animals came into the village. They had been drawn in by the fire. She let her long dark hair down and left the village hidden amoung the animals. She crawled for miles, hidden in the tall grass beside the road. She felt God protected her because she was never detected by soldiers. For eight days she did not eat. When she was found she still could not eat because her body was taken over by sadness. All she could do was cry. Once she was reunited with her eldest daughter, Fidelia, she found some joy knowing about the pregnancy. Fidelia told her mother that if her mother cried and did not eat, she would do the same and then the baby growing inside of her would die as well.

In El Mozote stands this memorial to the 1000 people who have died. In December, 2006 Rufina received an award for her 25 years of strength, faithful witness, and commitment to tell the story of El Mozote. She said, "Governments and individuals still try to deny the massacre of El Mozote. But I tell you that it's real, it happened, and I am not afraid to tell the truth."Partially due to Rufina's efforts and dedication this is one of the few sites in El Salvador where mass graves have been uncovered. The government FINALLY admitted that there was a massacre and the bones found were placed in a grave in front of this memorial which lists the names of the people who died. 74% of the bones exhumed were from children. In December , 1981 over 600 innocent children were brutally murdered.

When we asked Fidelia how she can continue to tell this story... why she has taken it on as her mission she mirrored the words of her mother: "I feel a little fear talking about this, but at the same time I reflect that my children died innocently. Why should I feel afraid to tell the truth? What has happened is reality, and we have to be strong to tell the story." But she ended by talking about faith. She said that it is important to see how much the people of El Salvador have gone through and how they have kept their strong faith in God. She said, that it can be an example that no matter how difficult life can get, to keep God in our lives. She said it is like the mural on the church. First there is darkness, but then the rainbow is the sign from God that things will get better. In the mural there are mirror butterflies and the children are being taken into heaven. All along the bottom are the names of the more 600 children who died. They are still working on getting their names to add to the list.

"It matters that all of you continue to tell our history,

so that future generations will use their presence, actions and words

to denounce violence against all peoples of the world."

Rufina Amaya

The civil war

Historically, the distribution of land and wealth in El Salvador was infinitely unequal. There were fourteen families who owned virtually all of the land and consequently all of the power. The original cash crop of El Salvador was Indigo which was widely desired because of the association of wealth that accompanied cloth dyed with indigo. In later years coffee and sugar cane were the major exports. The families who were land owner required people to work so they would allow these farmers and their families to live on a small plot on the circumference of their property in exchange for their labour. The farmers were given a small plot to use for their own personal farming, which they used to grow food or a crop to sell. These farmers were barely surviving, while the fourteen dominant families became richer and richer.

For many years the president was a dictator and the government was military run. There was no possible way that the vast majority could better their lives. Groups began to mobilize and the campisinos (peasants) decided to fight for what they deeply believed in. Guerrilla groups formed with the desire to overthrow the government. They wanted greater equality and were willing to die for the cause.



Seventy-five thousand people are estimated to have died during the civil war in El Salvador. Seventy-five thousand people died between the years of 1980 and 1992. EVERYONE was affected. There are physical, spiritual and emotional signs of the damage left in the land and the people of El Salvador. The underlying theme of almost every conversation we had mentioned the war.

Andrew, from the UCA (University of Central America) said that it was as though the entire country was suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). There is still a sense of shock and disbelief. For many years the government refused to be accountable for its actions and denied the assassination of thousands of men, women and children. The truth of what really happened during those 12 years is difficult to know with complete certainly because of a deeply seeded denial by the government. People continue to strive to tell their story and be heard but there is still so much healing that is needed. There was never any truth commissions so people from both sides of the war live together but victims have not been able to confront their accused, named what happened and move towards reconciliation. What is taught in private or church run schools about the civil war is very different than what is learned in the public school history lessons.

The guerrillas were receiving support, either morally or financially, from Russia, Cuba, Germany and some others. But the government’s military was receiving HUGE amounts of financial support from the United States Government that seemed to increase each year as the war continued. It is averaged that the USA gave $1.5 MILLION EACH DAY to support the government because of fear that El Salvador would become a communist country. I was confused by the billions of dollars of support that came from the United States but it was explained that if El Salvador became communist then other countries in Central America might follow and so the USA wanted to make sure that did not happen, as they wanted to retain their control.

There are a few facts that really stuck out in my mind. The first is that it was only when the USA stopped funding the war, the El Salvadorian government agreed to sign a peace accord. Imagine how many innocent lives would have been spared if they had not continued with such colossal support.

In no way do the statistics suggest that this civil war was balanced or even that it followed the rules of war. Many MANY innocent people died. People who spoke out were “disappeared”, entire communities were annihilated, priests and nuns were executed, children were dismembered. The government employed death squads. In the end, 95% of the deaths are attributed to the government’s side and 5% to the guerrillas. The United States supported this.


In 1992, the peace accord was signed and the Salvadorans are still waiting for most of the previsions to be met. The military WAS disbanded and the police had new training but the problems are still extremely evident. There is an election and most of the people we spoke to believe that if the FMLN party wins, the change will come. But no one expects change over night.

Healing has been obstructed by secrets. People want to tell their stories and so we listened. This history set the stage for most of the stories we heard over the following week……

....the story begins

Tell my story… these are the words that echo in my ears. I was invited into the deepest corners of their hearts so that I could understand their struggle; so that I might be a small part of the healing. I feel helpless and insignificant but I will do what I am able to do. I will tell their stories.

I have just returned from a visit to El Salvador with 20 other people from our United Church congregation. We spend eight days visiting San Salvador, Perquín, El Mozote, and Nuevo Esperanza. Our Educational visit was facilitated by The Center for Global Education at Augsburg College ( http://www.augsburg.edu/global/ ) and they did a fantastic job organizing speakers and activities that fit into our objective of learning about human rights and the culture in El Salvador. We have just arrived home, the visit has ended but the story has just begun.